Thursday, July 17, 2008



Dear Oddie,

Do you feel the breeze like I do? Have you felt this before? Have you ever felt the feather tickle from within and the racing heart beats? And do you feel it now? Have you felt the air smell different? A smell emanated by the warmth of your breathe. A hasty feel of being one. The feeling of oneness and having someone special is exciting and getting hooked for life sounds interesting. Getting hooked for life. The first time at least.

My love once said: 'I am yours. You are mine. Of this we are certain. You are lodged in my heart, the small key is lost. You must stay there forever'. Whenever he kissed me. I wondered whether it was just a kiss or whether he was whispering in my mouth. Flutter. That was the feeling I used to get then. A feeling reminiscent of love alone. I used to wonder how much a heart can hold. No one ever knew. Emotions that unwind as bundles of memories.

We have held each other in open arms. Have been stupid together. We have seen through each others ups and downs. We have shouted at each other over the silliest of cues. A remote control. Stinky socks. Turning up late for dates. Flirty friends. Where I had reached the verge of believing that being single is the death bell ringing. Flirtini for a sobriquet is better than being called someones girlfriend. But still at the end of the day, I have turned around to see whether he would smile if I look at him. My eyes would move so fast, in a desperate ego clutch so that he will not know that I was looking. Then even before he smiled, I would spring out of the sofa and cling onto his shoulder and plant a kiss on his cheeks and playfully brush my lips on his eyes. And there we knew to smile at each other. Smile from our hearts. Not just a blank expression on the face. Which I could still feel when I place his favourite red rose on his grave.

And so all I wanted to say is what we are feeling is a humanly whim which is the scroll bar stuck in window of time. Only that the system would hang for a second. You just have to restart the bit. And then you would realize that I was never yours. I was his. And he was mine...

I could still hear him say......“You are lodged in my heart, the small key is lost. You must stay there forever”
And I did...

Instead of just giving me unexpected cues. If you could take three seconds to say 'I love you', take three hours to explain it, And a lifetime to prove it.
I would be.................

Eternally yours,
Autumn leaf

1 comment:

murali said...

dat was a superb one